Fast Food Friday

We came in around 5 from an hour or so of fun in the back yard so I could make supper. The kids were hungry. I was hungry. I'm sure if Jason hadn't been catching a quick nap, he would have been hungry, too. I had the idea of making tomato soup, so I pulled out a can of tomatoes and some tomato sauce. Just then, the phone rang. The news on the other end was rather important and brain-consuming--not something I could prepare supper while discussing. Then the doorbell rang--the guy from the garage had brought our van back and needed someone to take him back to work. I went and woke Jason up to drive him, then continued the conversation. About five minutes after Jason left, our friend Greg stopped by. The pressing part of the conversation being through, I ended it gracefully.

Greg was here to pick up some stuff I had for his wife, and also thought to discuss some questions he had about our basement design for the new house. Jason had asked him for a quote on pouring it for us, but unfortunately, Jason wasn't here. I showed him the blueprints and tried to answer his questions the best I knew how, thinking that my dear husband should be returning at any moment. I watched the clock--my soup remained unstarted, and our guest was waiting. The cell phone was not with Jason, but on the counter in my purse.

Just as Greg was deciding that he should really get going, Jason returned. As soon as politely possible, I returned to the kitchen to resume dinner preparations. I glanced at the clock, which was striking a doleful 5:48, then cast a skeptical eye over the two cans on the countertop, thinking that I was not sure our family would survive the nuclear meltdown that would ensue if I made them wait a full hour before eating. Quick! I had to improvise!

The way I saw it, I could either: a) Run out for burgers and fries. Not so appealing, due to the junk food factor, and the fact that we seemed to be falling back on it a lot lately, or b) make sandwiches. I opted for c) neither of the above.

In the same amount of time it would have taken me to run out and grab supper from A&W, I made this. When Jude tried it, his verdict was "This is really really great!" Noah and Jabin had three helpings each. Needless to say, a hit. Bon appétit!

Penne Pasta in Juniper Rosa Sauce

1 454 g package Penne Brown Rice Pasta
filtered water
1 tbsp. extra-virgin olive oil
1/2 tsp. sea salt
1 28-oz. can whole organic tomatoes
4 cloves garlic, peeled
1/2 tsp. sea salt
1/2 tsp. dried juniper berries
1 c. grated organic cheddar cheese
1/4 c. snipped fresh basil
1/2 c. whipping cream
freshly-grated parmesan or asiago cheese to serve

Start pasta boiling in filtered water with oil and salt, according to package directions.

Place tomatoes and garlic cloves in a blender or food processor--blend on high speed for a few seconds to roughly chop. Place in medium saucepan on medium-low heat. Add salt, juniper berries and cheddar and stir until cheese is melted. Add basil and whipping cream and heat through.

Drain pasta, rinse with cold water and drain again. Put in large bowl and pour half of sauce overtop; save remainder in a glass jar in the fridge for another dish. Toss pasta and sauce and serve with fresh veggies or salad on the side.

Leftover sauce would go well in a casserole with stir-fried ground beef and onions; top with cheese, cover and heat through in medium oven.

The Dangers of Sodium Lauryl Sulfate

Here is a great article about some common ingredients that you probably were not even aware of before. Sodium Lauryl Sulfate and Sodium Laureth Sulfate are used in many of our everyday personal care products, in spite of the fact that they are known irritants and may be associated with PMS, male infertility, breast cancer, and menopausal symptoms.

Check it out. It's a short read. Then start checking your labels!

Sodium Lauryl Sulfate (SLS ) and Sodium Laureth Sulfate (SLES).
The Killers in your bathroom?

Both Sodium Lauryl Sulfate (SLS) and its close relative Sodium Laureth Sulfate (SLES) are commonly used in many soaps, shampoos, detergents, toothpastes and other products that we expect to "foam up". Both chemicals are very effective foaming agents, chemically known as surfactants.

SLS and SLES are esters of Sulphuric acid - SLS is also known as "Sulfuric acid monododecyl ester sodium salt", however there are over 150 different names by which it is known - see them here. In fact, SLES is commonly contaminated with dioxane, a known carcinogen.

For more info, please click on the link to read the full article.

Those Lazy Days of Summer

Because, despite the otherwise-craziness of this summer, childhood and warm weather both pass too quickly to not stop and enjoy them.

The Scents of Heaven

A while back, I mentioned that I had signed up to be a distributor with Young Living Essential Oils. This was not a decision that I entered into lightly. In fact, if you had told me two years ago that I would eschew synthetic drugs one day in favour of those "new-age, hokey" essential oils, I may have looked at you like you had an apple tree sprouting out your ears.

So why the change in heart? Well, I find that in so many ways, I am like Thomas the Doubter--I need to experience something and see it and touch it to believe it. In other words, I actually tried them.

The first oil I used was peppermint. My friend Dawn gave it to me when I was pregnant with Noah. Since that pregnancy began when Jude was only six months old, my body had not had sufficient time to recover, my liver began to get overloaded, and I suffered from nearly a cold a month (7 in all), as well as the flu and food poisoning, having to be hospitalized to be re-hydrated for the last two. Of course, when you are pregnant, you are not allowed to take drugs. I hadn't much cared to take them if I could help it even before that, but I would occasionally take an antihistamine to clear my sinuses at night so I could go to sleep. (I cannot fall asleep while breathing through my mouth. I have tried and failed many times.)

After a few months of misery, trying to sleep in the recliner, among other things, Dawn gave me the peppermint oil. Oh, gift from God! I would rub a few drops on my chest before bed, and if it was really bad, on my sinuses, too, and within ten minutes my head was clear and I was able to go to sleep like a baby. (In my case, my baby was sleeping pretty good, so that's actually saying something!)

After reading The Maker's Diet, I began to realize that there could be a wide range of applications for essential oils. It made sense to me--one of my favourite book series' as a kid was set in "prehistoric" times. What fascinated me the most was the author's obvious knowledge of plant properties, and how her characters used them for everything from easing an upset stomach, to anesthetic, to birth control. It was this series that awakened an interest in me in all things botanical. (If I had decided to pursue science instead of the arts for post-secondary education, I would have become a botanist.)

Of course, there was still that part of me that thought that a good chunk of the hoopla surrounding aromatherapy was just that, and that the oils could be of no real benefit besides mood alteration, if that.

Before I say anything else, I must tell you that the FDA has decreed that only a drug can "cure, prevent, or treat a disease." (This is ridiculous, but it's their decree.) As a distributor bound by contract to Young Living, who is under the legislation of the the United States Government, I am not allowed to make any claims that these oils can do any of these things, either. As soon as you say something natural can prevent disease, the FDA says it must be classified as a drug, be regulated, and likely have the price jacked way up since Big Pharma will then be able to patent it and take over its manufacture and distribution. (I'm surprised the FDA hasn't tried to regulate oranges because they can prevent and treat scurvy. Oh, wait. They are trying that right now.) This is why it is so difficult to find information on the practical applications of essential oils. I am, however, allowed to tell you how I've used them, and what the results have been.

I hope that reading this helps you to see that they may have a benefit for you and your family, as well. But buyer beware! Many oils on the market today are no more than perfume-grade oils, and are not suited for topical or internal use. Read your packaging wisely. If you become as frustrated as I was in trying to find high-quality essential oils locally, let me know, and I will assist you in receiving Young Living Essential Oils, right to your doorstep.

Ø Peppermint:

o besides what was already mentioned, to ease indigestion, take internally or rub a drop on the stomach

o Rub diluted with a little vegetable oil on children's feet when congested to help clear sinuses (this oil is too strong for the sensitive skin on other parts of their bodies)

o A drop or two in a water bottle to sip on to ease a sore throat—wonderful for singers!

o Rub a few drops on neck and shoulders throughout the day, as needed, for a natural energy boost without caffeine. Also leaves a refreshed, cooling feeling during hot, sticky weather.

Ø Lavender:

o most flexible, well-researched and “first” essential oil (Kind of a “wonder oil.”)

o Put a few drops in a spritzer with water and mist linens to combat dust mites and help provide a relaxing sleep

o Rub directly on the feet of children to help them settle, or diluted with oil on babies’ feet to calm them when fussy.

o Apply to a burn or scrape to help it heal without a scar. (I’ve heard it can also be used to help reduce old scar tissue, but haven’t tried that one yet.)

o Apply to plantar’s warts over a drop of fresh aloe vera gel and cover with duct tape to get rid of them.

o Rub on palms and inhale several times to help calm nerves when children are driving me crazy!

Ø Thieves Blend (Clove, Lemon, Cinnamon Bark, Eucalyptus radiata, and Rosemary):

o So named after 15^th-century thieves who protected themselves from the Black Plague while robbing bodies by rubbing themselves with a similar blend.

o Tested at Weber State University for its potent antimicrobial properties.

§ 99.96% kill rate against airborne bacteria.

§ Highly antiviral, antiseptic, antibacterial, anti-infectious and help to protect the body against such illnesses as flus, colds, sinusitis, bronchitis, pneumonia, sore throats, cuts, etc.

§ Gary Young (founder of Young Living) also diffused for 24 hours to kill black mold.

o I keep some in a spritzer bottle with water to clean everything from my toilets, mirrors, kitchen and bathroom countertops, table, chairs, windows, carpet (spot-clean), whatever. It’s amazing!

o For children, diffuse into the air when they start to get sick to help their bodies overcome the attacking illness. Either that, or rub some diluted with pure vegetable oil on their feet.

o For myself, I take some in a glass of water if I feel a sore throat coming on, or if I have to stay up late several nights in a row so my body is getting a little run-down.

Ø Lemon:

o Purify and give a refreshing flavour to water (mask chlorine taste in restaurants)

o Help boost liver function

o Natural solvent: Use it to clean adhesives off of things

o Natural disinfectant: Cleaned the disgustingly dirty high-chair tray in a restaurant with lemon oil and a baby wipe!

Ø Melaleuca Alternifolia (Tea Tree)

o Wonderful, non-stinging way to cleanse a cut—good for children.

o Apply a drop morning and night to a blemish to dry up zits.

o I’ve also heard this is good for bug bites. (It also has insect-repelling properties.)

o Used to painlessly get rid of plantar’s warts in a few weeks—a drop of aloe gel, plus a drop of oil, then cover with a band-aid or duct tape. (Switched to lavender when I ran out of Tea Tree.)

o Natural disinfectant—can be used instead of Thieves for disinfecting surfaces and cuts.

Ø Clove:

o Help ease back-ache

o Used a drop of Thieves on a cotton swab to help alleviate a sore gum for Jabin when teething (Clove oil is actually one of the active ingredients in Orajel!)

Ø Pan-Away:

o Used on a twisted ankle that was still aching after twelve hours—applied Pan-Away twice, about an hour apart, and ache disappeared.

o Used on fingers and hand that were cramping and sore from over-use (felt like tendons were cramping.)

o Looking forward to trying it for menstrual cramps!

Ø Release:

o After being “gently” rear-ended, used it topically to help relieve aching muscles in my back, shoulders and neck, as well as help rejuvenate my mood. (Also used Pan-Away on back where it was put out and sore).

Ø Purification:

o Used to cleanse children’s cuts and scrapes.

o Used to help cleanse odours from the house when a mouse died and started rotting in the crawlspace.

Ø Dragon Time:

o Help to regulate mood and cramps during PMS day.

Ø Eucalyptus globulus:

o Use steam inhalation to clear sinuses and respiratory tract, and boost immune function.

I am continually finding new uses for the oils. While I may not have time to post everything I use them for, in the few short months I have used them on a full-time basis, they have already proved to be of more benefit than I can describe. I would encourage you to look at ways that you can work with your body's immune system, by harnessing the natural properties of plants, instead of inundating yourself and your family with more toxins that your body must flush out.

Have a great Sunday, friends.

Just The Way You Are

When I was almost eighteen years old, I had my first "real" kiss. It was with my prom date, Alan. I barely knew him, but he was the son of a friend of my dad, and had a reputation for being a killer dancer, so I asked him to be my escort.

After the prom, I hosted an all-night "dry" bash at my house. Dad helped me build a huge bonfire in the corral, get chips and pop and party food, and get things ready. Then he went inside and left us alone. I'm sure he was as aware as we were that not a single other grad showed up--even my own, non-drinking friends. Despite this, I don't think he even sat by the living room window with his binoculars trained on us the whole night. He trusted me, and that's pretty cool.

The next day, I had a lot on my mind. Kissing wasn't exactly what I had imagined it would be. Alan had been as inexperienced as I, and in the end, I'm not sure how much either of us enjoyed it. Where was the swelling music? Where were the shooting stars? Where were the tingles? Why did it feel more like two leeches joined at the mouth than a magical, mystical experience from heaven?

How cool is it that the person that I trusted most to talk about my first kiss with (and the lack of pleasure therein) was my dad? And he didn't squirm out of it, as many fathers would have done when discussing uncomfortable topics with their teenage daughter. That conversation sticks out in my mind as one of the most amazing memories with my father--he was so cool about it all.

This is only one experience out of many that I could mention about the ways my dad has always been there for me. On this Father's Day, I just want to celebrate that not only is he an amazing father, I am glad that I can also call him friend.

Happy Father's Day, Dad. I love you. (Aren't you glad I don't need to ask you about kissing anymore?)

Today, I Learned...

• Shredding paper is fun. (I got a new office paper shredder yesterday.)
• Using essential oils really can help improve my mood. After applying Young Living's Release blend after lunch, my mood went from I-just-can't-seem-to-snap-out-of-it-BLAH to much-more-at-peace-with-myself-and-the-world-Stable. (The paper-shredding might be helping, too.)
• That in a four-year-old's mind, the shortest distance between the muddy back yard and the muddy front yard is through the house. With your boots still on, of course.
• That in a three-year-old's mind, when you realize that pooping in your pants lands you in a not-so-pleasant shower, the alternative is not to poop in the potty, but rather to try and change your own diaper.
• That the Canadian Cancer Society is actually more concerned with the fulfillment of it's intended purpose than I thought. They have just announced a national program to use vitamin D supplementation to actually prevent cancer! Amazing, eh?
• That when you hit "Control-P" by accident when typing a blog post, Blogger thinks you actually want to publish it already. Good to know the new keyboard shortcut, but I wasn't actually ready yet!
• That even a little bit of bumper-car action can leave you stiff and sore.
• That no matter how much paperwork I get done, there is always more to do.
• That most things in life are made better by a hug from someone who loves you.

What have you learned today, friends?

The Right Turn

It took me a moment to realize what had happened. My brain quickly connected all the stuff falling off my dash to the jolted van to the cries that soon began emanating from my toddler's carseat.

I've been rear-ended.

Jabin and I were in Grande Prairie doing some errands for the day. I had just left Costco, and was turning right onto the main thoroughfare from the more-secondary road next to their parking lot when I noticed a car zipping up on me in the lane I was turning into, so I stopped. That's when the sickening crunch rang through the vehicle.

I pulled up on the side of the road and put on the hazard lights. I quickly ran back to the car, noticing that the lady was on her cell phone, and hysterical. Between her sobs and apologies, I managed to ask her to pull up ahead to the next block so we could be off the road.

After pulling into the parking lot of Mickie-D's, I went around the van to get Jabin. As soon as I pulled him out of the vehicle, he quickly calmed down. The impact had not been hard--I knew I had not suffered any ill effects, and was certain that Jabin had not had any whiplash either. I chocked his tears up to fear. (Later, while changing his diaper, I noticed that he had bit his lip rather hard on the inside, and it was slightly swollen and purple. This seems to be the worst injury either of us experienced.)

Stacy, the lady in the little silver car, was beside herself. Despite my assurances that we were all right, it was just some minor damage to the van and her car, she kept apologizing over and over again, saying things like, "I just got in from B.C. to see my dad. He's gonna kill me! My boyfriend's gonna kill me!"

I felt sorry for her, actually--yes, it was a sucky thing to happen, but at least we were all okay, and we both have collision insurance (I was more concerned that she have it, since hers would be paying!), so although she was understandably shaken, I thought she must have very little grace extended to her in her life if she was more worried about her father's and boyfriend's reactions being negative toward her rather than concern for her well-being. (Did that sentence make any sense at all?)

We exchanged information, and I replaced Jabin in his car seat so I could hurry over to Home Depot and get some cabinet ideas before they closed.

It wasn't until I was buckling myself back into the van that I remembered the thing that makes the whole event just amazing--a total reminder of how God looks after his kids.

The stop before Costco had been Wal-Mart. As I was buckling Jabin back into his seat there, I noticed that the seat belt holding his car seat in was slack.

What the--?

Further investigation revealed that Noah, who has recently discovered how to unlatch seatbelts, had been practicing his new-found skills on Jabin's restraint. Normally, I buckle Jabin in from the other side, where we have removed one of the seats from the middle row to make it easier to buckle everyone in from one position. Had I done that at Wal-Mart, instead of buckling him in from the other side, I would likely not have noticed that he had virtually nothing keeping his car-seat onto the van's seat.

Had I not noticed that, today's story could have been a lot more tragic.

As realization swept over me, my heart lifted in praise to Jehovah Jireh, God the Provider, for showing me what needed to be done today to protect both of his kids in our van with such timeliness.

Perhaps this was meant as a divine appointment, so I may have the opportunity to pour love on Stacy. Even if only briefly, this may be my chance to help lift her up.

And that, my friends, is truly amazing.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28 (NIV)

There's nothing better than true love--unless, of course, it's a mutton, lettuce, and tomato sandwich...

Kids can be tricky to feed, especially if what you are trying to get them to eat is actually good for them. While fruit is always popular, too much fruit isn't good for a body, either.

So what's a mom to do?

I have a collection of tried-and-true, I-know-my-kids-like-these recipes for quick and easy snacks and lunches. I thought I would start posting them up here a few at a time, beginning today. (Guess what? Adults like them, too!)

This type of meal is particularly nice for summer, when you want to be spending as little time as possible in the kitchen so you can be outside, instead. Enjoy!

Cheesy Garlic Bread
Makes 8 servings.

8 slices sprouted-grain bread
1/2 c. home-made mayo
1 garlic clove, pressed
1/2 tsp. dried, rubbed basil, or 2 tbsp. fresh snipped
1/2-1 c. grated organic cheddar
1/2 c. grated asiago or parmesan cheese

Arrange bread slices in a single layer on a baking sheet. (I use Pampered Chef's stoneware Bar Pan.) Mix remaining ingredients in a bowl, then spread evenly over bread. Heat in 375 degree F oven for about 15-20 minutes, until cheese is melted and bubbly. Cool slightly and serve.

Variation:
Cheesy Tomato Bread: Prepare slices and cheese mixture as above. After spreading cheese mixture on bread, spread 1/4 cup finely chopped white or yellow onions on, then arrange thinly-sliced roma (plum) tomatoes on top. Sprinkle about another 1/2 cup of grated cheddar over this. Bake for 25-30 minutes, until cheese is golden.


Tuna and Cheese Melts

8 slices sprouted-grain bread
1 6 1/2 oz (184 g) can of tuna, drained
1 c. organic cheddar cheese
2 tbsp. finely chopped onion
2 hard-boiled eggs, chopped finely (I use an egg slicer and slice it three ways to make itty-bitty squares)
1/2 tsp. sea salt
1/3 c. mayo

Arrange bread on baking sheet. Mix remaining ingredients and spread over top. Bake in 350 degree F oven until cheese has melted, about 20 minutes.
(This recipe was inspired by a recipe found in Company's Coming Soups and Sandwiches book.)

Other sandwiches that are always sure to please:

• Peanut Butter and Honey
• Peanut Butter and Banana
• Peanut Butter and Raisin
• Grilled Cheese

Remember, when trying to make healthy stuff for kids, 90% of the difference comes not so much in what you make, as what you make it with. Choose sprouted-grain bread over white, choose "just peanuts" peanut butter over sweetened, hydrogenated processed, choose raw honey over processed or pasteurized, and choose organic ingredients whenever you have the option.

And remember: if you can make it fun, they will probably eat it. Get them to help make it, or make funny faces out of the ingredients on top. Use your imagination! Go wild!

Neck-Deep

For years, one of my favourite magazines has been Kitchen and Bath Ideas from Better Home and Gardens. I would pick it up occasionally, drooling over page after page of granite counter tops, stainless-steel professional gas ranges, and immaculately-tiled back splashes, knowing that each and every kitchen must have cost a fortune in the remodel--a fortune I didn't have to spend on a kitchen I didn't have to remodel. But I liked looking and dreaming, anyway.

Now, the time has come. Here we are, busily planning our "dream house"--or as close as we can get on a budget. Suddenly, I am actually planning exactly how I want my kitchen laid out. And there are so many decisions to make! What kind of cabinets do I want? What colour? What kind and colour of flooring? Where should the fridge be in relation to the island? To the dining room? How big should the window be? What should the countertops be made of? Gas or electric oven?

And that's just the kitchen.

Did you know that when someone built your house, someone had to decide what kind of doorhandles to use, what kind of toilets to put in, whether to stucco, drywall, or put a tile drop-ceiling in, what kind of windows to use, and the list goes on and on. If you are one of those people who has a hard time making decisions, I am not sure whether building a house would be for you, or not. On the one hand, it might cure you forever. On the other hand, you might wrestle at length with every little detail, slowing down the building process, and then regret the decision you finally made every time you glanced at that feature after you move in.

It's exciting, it just feels a bit like we're in a hurry. Oh, wait. We are in a hurry--our goal to move in is sometime in September or, at latest, October. Eep!

So, if I don't call, e-mail, write, or comment on your blog, it's not that I don't love you and miss you. I am most likely thinking of you fondly at that very moment. And if you would think fondly of me in return, and perhaps send up a prayer on my behalf, it would be appreciated.

'Cause it just means that I'm neck deep.

Have You Heard Hee Ah Lee?

This is an amazing story about a Korean pianist. She is twenty years old. At the beginning of the clip, she plays Chopin's Ballade in G Minor beautifully. She has no legs below the knee. And only two fingers on each hand.

It takes ten minutes, but this video is worth the watch. Tell ya, it gives me hope! (Amazing what hard work and determination can do!)



Edit: My college buddy Frank, pianist extraordinaire, has corrected me: She is not playing the Ballade, but is actually playing Chopin's Fantasie Impromptu. At least I got the Chopin part right!

Skip five--or maybe not.

Skip--5 minutes.

It had been reminding me every day, just like that, for at least two months. Every time I would sit my soft tushy down in my chair at my desk, open Outlook, and look at my daily schedule, there it would be--not pushy, but a present reminder of an unkept promise to myself.

One, two, three, four...

The rope smacked the laminate in front of me as my bare toes pushed off in unison, the rope slid underneath, and my toes made contact with the floor again.

I had had a few false starts where, instead of smacking the floor, the rope had made a painful acquaintance with my shins. I tsk, tsked myself, then shrugged--I guess that's what happens when you don't handle a skipping rope for almost twenty years.

...eight, nine, ten...

I was actually skipping rather quickly--much faster than the easy, take-your-time-and-jump-over-one-leg-at-a-time approach I used to have during school recesses. No "Cinderella dressed in yellow" here--although my brain had time to go a mile a minute, I was hard-pressed to even gasp out the few words it required to tell Jude to stay well clear of the rope's path as it whizzed through the air.

...fifteen, sixteen, seventeen...

Five minutes? It seemed so basic, almost laughable, when I had first put it into the daily planner. Of course I can do five minutes! I can do it while I am waiting for the oatmeal to cook in the morning! I can do it while I am watching my kids play outside! Piece of cake!

...twenty-four, twenty-five, twenty-six...

Did I really say five minutes? I can hardly breathe here, and I'm only at twenty-seven reps!

Thirty!

Okay, time for a break.

Jude asked me a question. I wheezed out a response between gasps. I thought of the triceps that had been flapping rather annoyingly while I bounced. I thought of the slim-but-not-very-well-toned calves that were just barely getting warmed up. As soon as my breathing was under control, I did another thirty reps.

Then I collapsed on the couch.

Five minutes? I guess I'll have to work up to that.

Jurassic-Sized

Remember Jumanji? Remember the mosquitos the size of baby elephants that could break car windows and drill through solid oak doorways?

That's what the mosquitos are like here right now.

Nowhere so much so as our property. When we were out there last night, Jason said, "These are the kind of mosquitos that go home and smoke cigars and drink beer at night." And they were out for our blood.

Hopefully, they die down a little in a few weeks. In the meantime, here are some pics of the new digs. (Click on any photo to see it larger.)

There a TONS of wild strawberries all over the field. I hope I actually get to have some, before some bird or woodland creature snaggles them all.

"The mosquitos are coming! The mosquitos are coming!"

On the "road" side of the trees.

Look! I was there! Really, I was!

No, really!

"Be careful, Mr. Ryan. Not everything in here reacts well to mosquitos." (Poor Jabin! Today he got it even worse!)

The gory aftermath of the Killing of the Bloodsuckers--which ensued when we had to get back into our van to leave.